Saturday, June 20, 2009

Please, No More "Help"

[From season 11 of the Simpsons, episode "Last Tap Dance in Springfield"]

Vicki the famous tap dancer: [addresses her class] Okay, kids, tonight's the big night! Now remember: the important thing is to just dance flawlessly.

Lisa: Excuse me, why isn't my name in the program?

Vicki: It is, silly. You've got the most important part of all. [flips through the pamphlet]

Lisa: Curtain puller?!

Vicki: No one can see the show if the curtain isn't open.

Lisa: Bu-- My parents are counting on seeing me dance! And I've worked ever so hard.

Vicki: I'm sorry, Lisa, but giving everyone an equal part when they're clearly not equal is called what, again, class?

Class: Communism!

Vicki: That's right. And I didn't tap all those Morse code messages to the Allies 'til my shoes filled with blood to just roll out the welcome mat for the Reds.


Watch out folks, there's evidently more to come. With complete and utter disregard for his legacy and "despite all the evidence to the contrary" of 'saving' an estimated 150,000 jobs amid the 1.6 million lost since the economy was stimulated in February, President Obama assures us that he will not yet rest on his laurels and promises to do even more.


As repugnant as it is hearing about his favorite places to eat or who he picks to win sporting championships or whichever fashion trend his wife is setting this week, I think I'd rather the President sit in his royal court all day and waste our time in that manner as opposed to any further attempts at governing - for which he is clearly not well suited.

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